Why Resolutions Fail

Baby Steps

This is about the time of year when people begin giving up on their resolutions in droves. I have done a lot of thinking about this fact and I think I've come up with some major reasons as to why people abandon all their grandiose goals not 1/6 of the way through the year. 

The first is all about change. This is the same reason political revolutions fail. If something was quick in changing, it will be quick in changing back. If you're overhauling your entire lifestyle (or overthrowing an entire government, I don't know what you do in your spare time) 9 times out of 10, you'll end up right where you started.

For instance, look at yo-yo dieting. Someone decides they want to lose as much weight as possible in as little time as possible, so they overhaul their entire eating habits. It normally leads to hunger and intense cravings (I don't care how many female-targeted diet brands say they can curb your late night cravings. When mama wants some chocolate at 11 pm, your granola bar's not gonna cut it) that then lead to losing the diet entirely. In most cases, people who go on these extreme diet programs will gain back all the weight they lost (lookin' at you, Kirstie Alley) and in a lot of cases, gain even more. 

Gradual change, however, lasts longer. By steadily eating slightly smaller amounts, you can actually decrease the size of your stomach. Still go for your normal snack routine, but switch to healthier alternatives. If you want something crunchy, go for carrots. If you want something sweet, go for fruit. Trade in white bread for wheat. Get a medium instead of a large. One day you'll look back and realize you actually have a healthy lifestyle and you can't remember exactly how it happened. 

Another reason I've noticed people fail is they have a sort of "perfection or bust" mentality. They want to go to the gym on a strict schedule. The first few times they can't make it, they give up the endeavor entirely. Which is asinine, as perfection is impossible. You're going to get sick, have a hectic schedule, or just forget to work out.Imagine if we took that mentality with other things in our life. Say the first time the supervisor at work had to discuss something with you that you were doing wrong (apparently at Target you can't tell people walking into your lane you're about to go on break even though NO ON PAYS ATTENTION TO THE LIGHTS ABOVE THE REGISTERS). Since you weren't doing it perfectly, your response is to quit the job entirely. Or say a student in school got a bad grade on a test and their response was to drop out of school and ride the rails as a hobo. It sounds stupid when put in those contexts, yet breaking down and having a soda (which I have not done...yet) seems to be excuse enough to return to caffeine-guzzling habits. The solution isn't to give up and wait till next year. Just take some Nyquil to beat the cold, rework your schedule, make a note. Get back to the gym the next day. Drink more water. 

 A third reason I've seen so many people fail to change is because they seem to relegate changes in lifestyle to being a strictly New Years Resolution thing. People thought it was strange that I began my resolutions before New Years. What would have been the point in waiting? It wasn't like the dead days of the holidays had magical "calories don't count" properties (but seriously, how awesome would it be if they did?). I decided I wanted to change for the better, so I started right away. And just because it's February doesn't mean it's the wrong time to change your lifestyle. My sister is making another attempt to quit smoking. As the girl who had to repeatedly leave the concert venue to stand outside so she could indulge in the habit, I wholeheartedly support this decision. Whatever, wherever, whenever the urge to shake things up for the better hits you, go for it. 

Today we have learned 

(Alternatively titled: "And so what we have learned applies to our lives today")

Beaucoup brownie points if you get that reference. 

A. You are not going to completely change yourself overnight. If you try, you're setting yourself up for failure. 

B. Short term failure is not an excuse to give up long term goals. 

C. Any time is a great time to make a better you. 

Happy February Resolutions Everybody!

The Beauty of Habits

21 Days

There's the old belief that it takes only 21 days to break yourself a habit or instill a new habit into your lifestyle. Now this may or may not be true (and I may or may not have given up on reading the articles discussing it out of boredom) but the idea behind it is true. If you work hard enough to instill new habits in your life, sooner or later they take off with you. 

Tonight after pit rehearsal (and a surprising dizzy spell, but I couldn't very well pass out in front of the same band director twice) my mom asked if I wanted to stop for a drink. In the old days of last year, my thoughts would have immediately jumped to "oooh, yes, Dr. Pepper". Instead it turned into "yeah, I could go for a Powerade. Now sports drinks may not be that much better for you, but it does prove one nice fact: I have broken my inherit cravings for soft drinks. I do not longingly stare at the bottles behind the glass at the gas station. I don't sigh when I see the "3 for $12" sale at Walmart. And I believe my wallet thanks me for that. 

The best part about habits is that you don't break them by skipping them for a day. True, I've skipped the morning workout more than once over the course of this month and a half. Some days it's for valid reasons. Other days...well I found out that I am not wholly capable of convincing myself to do as much as I should be. But the next day I always pick it up again. The other day I put on a pair of pants I used to avoid wearing as it was incredible tight around the thighs. But I realized they're not as tight. It's a small victory, but I was Z-snapping my way through that day. 

The not habitual things are a bit harder to keep up with. I haven't touched the story in a while (partially because I'm STILL WAITING ON PEOPLE TO GET BACK TO ME WITH COMMENTS) but I try to keep it in my thoughts. Fortunately for me, it is the beginning of a series that I have gigantic plans for so I'm always thinking about it. And tonight I finally began the formatting process to get the manuscript to novel standard. It is a marvelous process that makes your original manuscript much longer. It's actually over 250 pages now. Not bad for a manuscript written in a month and a half.  

I also finished yet another book for the reading challenge. It was "The Mammoth Book of Zombie Comics". And I learned two things. A. - It is not smart to read horror while you're laying on the floor of your bedroom (I swear to Zeus I was scared to look up because I knew I would be in-sight of the space under my bed). B -  There is still pleasure in finishing a book regardless of what kind of book it is.

Nearly halfway through the second month of the year and the New Year's resolutions are still going strong. At least...the ones I've started already. Is there such a thing as "March Resolutions"?

The Stupidity of Calling the Other Side Stupid: A Note on Facebook Politics

It has arrived.

A dreaded month. The only holiday is reserved for people in relationships (a fact which would make the original St. Valentine weep, but that is a discussion for another day) and spring is still several weeks out. Admittedly I have not stayed true to my workout as I would like. The workout was skipped a couple days and I seem to be struggling to wake up at 8:30 am. I still have few shifts a week, which leaves me fairly bored. I finished 4 books in one month (although the Shel Silverstein was an easy read) and have a couple more picked out besides.

I could go on about other things in regard to my resolutions (apparently I make incredibly shippable characters) but I would rather wax a bit philosophical. The Iowa caucus is tonight. People are working on what candidate to support as I speak, so naturally it's in the front of my mind. And there's one particularly thing I've noticed. People are stupid. Not for their political views. But because they equate political views with intelligence. 

These days Facebook is filled with jokes and memes that mock the opposite side's intelligence. Republicans are idiots that don't understand climate change or the first amendment. Democrats are idiots that don't understand economics or the second amendment. Sanders is a communist. Trump is a fascist. The Democrats apologizers will be our downfall. The Republican bible thumpers will lead us into a new dark age. 

All of that is stupid. 

I'll admit to sharing my own comics mocking Republican stances, but lately I've seen how it comes across from the other side. If you share those things or say those things, you don't look like an intelligent social observer. You look narrow-minded. You look like you can't handle the other side's argument. In short, you look unintelligent. Mocking someone's stance has never been an effective tool for changing their mind. If anything, it convinces them they're in the right.

Do you have to agree with the other side? Of course not. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But never equate opinions with intelligence. Just use the golden rule. If you don't want someone to call you a anti-abortion bigot, don't call them a baby killer. If you don't want someone to call you a lazy-ass welfare recipient, don't call someone a greedy capitalist pig. There's a difference between an attack and returning fire. If you can't handle the war, don't fire the first shot.