I Did A Thing

I Made a Promise

...mostly to myself. I promised myself that when the weather was warmer, I would do two things: start running and begin learning how to drive. Well the last few days have been absurdly nice and it promises to stick around for a few days (but nothing beyond that) so I'm left to hold myself to my promises. 

The first was the running. I had heard of an app called "Zombies, Run" that was supposed to make running more interesting. You essentially have two apps running at once (which can kill your phone battery, but whatever). There's whatever you're using to play music, right now I'm on a Pandora Station until I can figure a way to use the music I have on my phone, and there's the actual Zombie app. Then at random points, the other "survivors" of the fictional zombie apocalypse will come over the "radio" to  give you an update on where the zombies are behind you or to give you encouragement. (I have to admit, hearing a "wow, look at them go" does wonders). There's an entire storyline behind it. For example, you learn that the runner that died before you was in love with the radio operator. [insert sad face] 

But if there's one thing I've learned from all my attempts at working out, it's that those fitness gurus that tell you "you'll feel great!" are LIARS. Yeah, it'll feel good eventually....after weeks of "death by heart disease sounds pretty good right about now". My calves were burning, my chest was constricted. And it just about overall sucked. So it speaks volumes that I'm actually willing to do it again tomorrow. 

Also tomorrow, I've talked to my dad about practicing driving. It wont be my first time behind the wheel, but at this point it'll be basically like I'm starting over. And when I say that this is a big deal for me, I'm not white-girl-exaggerating. I do not like the concept of being behind the wheel of a machine capable of taking human life. I am spacey and day-dreamy. And before someone replies with "just pay attention" or "just concentrate", let me say that those phrases do literally nothing and are no help. I have been cursed/blessed with a wandering mind for the past nearly-23 years of my life. I have been hit by cars (at very low speeds) because of daydreaming. Someone has screamed right behind me and I, sans-headphones, did not even hear them. If saying things like "focus" suddenly snapped me back to reality, then my imagination would really not be that impressive. 

But driving is a skill I can't really justify being without entirely, even if I hope against hope that I will live in a major city with public transit. So I'm going to face my anxiety-inducing, "fuck, I'm gonna end up on the news tonight" fears for the chance that I might be able to go somewhere without bothering someone for a ride. And those fears are when I know the person sitting shot gun. I don't even wanna think about the driving test.